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Hampi, India. Picture by Me
Traveling to Asia is often a "bucket list" item, but even the most seasoned travelers can find themselves in a state of total bewilderment when they land. What’s considered polite or normal in the United States can sometimes be the exact opposite across the Pacific.
To help you navigate your next trip (or just win your next trivia night), we’re diving into a few cultural practices that usually give Americans a bit of a "wait, what?" moment.
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1. The "No-Touch" Zone: Public Affection
In the U.S., a quick kiss or a long hug in public is NBD (no big deal). However, in many parts of Asia, public displays of affection like kissing are deeply frowned upon. On the flip side, you might see friends of the same gender holding hands, a common sign of platonic "bestie" energy that Americans often misinterpret!
2. The "Resume" Approach: Arranged Marriages
While the West prioritizes "falling in love" first, many families in Asia view marriage as a union of two families, not just two people. Modern arranged marriages are often more like "assisted dating," where parents suggest a match based on values and compatibility, but the couple has the final "yes" or "no." Matrimonial or match making agencies still flourish here.
Pic by Me
3. The "Clean Floor" Rule: Shoes Off
If you walk into a home in Asia with your Adidas on, expect a gasp of horror. Shoes are seen as "dirty" or having negative energy from outside. Most homes provide indoor slippers or expect you to walk in socks or barefeet. This keeps the living space pristine and serves as a mental boundary between the chaotic outside world and the sanctuary of the home.
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4. The Squat & Splash: Toilet Basics
Forget the plush 3-ply Charmin. In many rural (and some urban) parts of Asia, you’ll find squat toilets. Even more surprising for Americans? The lack of toilet paper. Instead, you’ll find a bidet (handheld sprayer) or a lota (a small water pot) or bucket and mug. It might feel intimidating at first, but many locals swear it’s much more hygienic than paper.
5. The Downward Glance: Avoiding Eye Contact
In America, looking someone in the eye is a sign of confidence and honesty. In many Asian cultures however, prolonged direct eye contact with a superior or a person of the opposite sex can be seen as aggressive, challenging, or even flirtatious. Looking slightly downward is often a sign of humility and deference.
6. The Ultimate Respect: Bowing and Touching Feet
In India, it’s common to see young people touch the feet of their elders (Pranāma) to seek blessings. In Japan or Thailand, the depth of your bow communicates your level of respect. It’s a physical acknowledgment that "I recognize your wisdom and experience."
7. "Hey John"? Not Here.
Calling an elder or a boss by their first name is a major faux pas in almost every Asian country. Whether it’s using "Auntie/Uncle” or for neighbors (even if they aren't related) or specific honorifics like -san or -nim, or -ji , the language is built to reinforce social hierarchy. Boys or girls elder by a few years are also addressed by specific titles, depending on the country (like didi meaning elder sister and bhai meaning elder brother in India).
8. The Universal Welcome: The Tea Offering and Not Taking Money from Guests
In the U.S., you might offer a guest a glass of water if they look thirsty. In most Asian countries, offering tea is non-negotiable. It’s the "universal handshake" of hospitality. Even if you’re just dropping off a package, don't be surprised if you're ushered in for a hot cup of oolong or chai.
If you are a guest and you go out for a coffee or meal, it is almost certain they will not let you pay or share the expenses.
Dosa- try eating it with a fork? Difficult 😅. Pic by Me
9. The Digital Dining Experience: Eating with Your Hands
For many Americans, eating with hands is reserved for pizza, burgers, or wings. But in India, Ethiopia, and some other parts of Southeast Asia, picking up rice, curry, or lentils with your fingers is the standard and there’s a fascinating philosophy behind it.
Why do they do it?
The Sensory Connection: In Vedic tradition (India), each finger represents one of the five elements (Space, Air, Fire, Water, Earth). Bringing the food to your mouth with your fingertips is thought to stimulate these elements, beginning the digestion process before the food even hits your tongue.
Temperature Control: Your fingers are nature’s thermometer. Touching the food prevents you from burning your mouth, a "fail-safe" that forks and spoons just don't provide.
The "Rule of the Right": Here’s the catch for Westerners—you must only use your right hand. In many of these cultures, the left hand is reserved for "bathroom duties," making it strictly taboo at the dinner table.
Pic by Me. Yeah, these are mine :)
10. Never Kick an object, especially a Book
Books and musical instruments are seen as physical manifestations of Saraswati, the Goddess of Knowledge and Arts.
The Head is High, the Feet are Low: The feet are considered the "dirtiest" part of the body, while the head is the most sacred. Touching a source of knowledge with your feet is seen as a profound sign of disrespect or "stepping on" wisdom itself.
The "Sorry" Gesture: If you do accidentally trip over a backpack containing books, the custom is to immediately touch the book with your right hand and then touch your chest or forehead. This is a silent way of asking for forgiveness from the "divinity" within the object.
Which of these would be the hardest for you to adapt to? (Personally, the squat toilet takes some serious leg strength!). Do you have anything else to share? I would love to hear!
Happy Travels, Yogi 💕
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